This and that

-started yesterday, tues 5/12....

Hmm, what to post today. I know I've said it before, but it seems that the days I don't make it to the computer, I have such great topics to discuss. However, when I get a chance to get on here, it's as if I get writer's block. Can't think of single thing of interest to discuss. I could mention how I feel as though I am going out of my mind this evening. Just.go.to.bed.already. PUUULLLEEAAASSE!

Makenneh had a meltdown today. Over what? A baby robin. She found their nest yesterday and watched them. She was so excited to tell me all about the baby birds this morning. She said she would show me when she got home from school. (She discovered them last night while I was at bunco.) So, she gets home, all excited to tell grandma and they go out there to discover the birds were being taught how to fly. Fly away baby birdies. She didn't think that was good. And she cried and cried, reall sobs, with real big, gigantic tears because she loves them and they will go away and never come back and look mom, that bird doesn't want to leave me. He loves me. Why does his mom want him to fly. I don't want him to fly, i want him to stay down here with me. Beeeccaaauuuusee Iiiiii LOOoooooooveeee Himmmm. Mooooooom.

Oh my what do you say to all that?! Makenneh it is part of nature. It is how God designed it. Birds are hatched, they grow wings and fly away. That's just what they do. The birds belong to God, not us. We get to watch them, enjoy them, even feed them...but we can't keep them. If he stayed here and never learned to fly he would die. That wouldn't be nice would it? And besides are you going to chew up worms to feed to him, because I certainly won't. She cried for quite some time over the bird. This child and animals.

THe past couple of days she has been sooo emotional. Almost like a pre-teen getting ready for her first period. It's insane.

A tire on my car blew out today. Thankfully it happened while it was just me and Jeremy in the car. So, that car will remained parked until we get the money to get some work done on the front end, because otherwise it continues to chew through tires. WE can't afford that. We just put tires on it March 23rd. They were used, but we did that because we knew they would get chewed up. Just didn't think it would be that fast. I could cry about it, but it won't change anything. I will just be thankful that I don't have classes right now and nowhere in particular to be besides the Senior Center, which I have cut down to once a week.

-finished today, 5/13

Yeah, mom jumped on the computer when I got up to get kids in bed. So, I had to finish this post today. I had a rough "day at the office" today. I have only been going in to the Senior Center on Wednesdays now. My class is over and technically, I don't have to go at all. But, I love it there and Ruben loves having me there. If he had his way, I think I would be there every day. I am also learning valuable things to take with me and have opportunity for certain certificates/training. So, I continue to volunteer. Anyway, today was a day that brought to life many of the real dilemmas I will face as a Social Worker. We had one client come in because her house is set to be condemned today and that leaves her with 30 days to find somewhere to live and no money to do it, a heft mortgage still owed on her house, and a mooch of a guy who lives with her (she fostered him as a child and well, she is still fostering him despite his being 50 yrs old). He is an alcoholic and basically bleeds her dry. She said she will be homeless before she will live in a senior housing complex where he can't go. She also stated she would die in that house if he can't go wtih her. It is sad. Completely sad. So, we are working on finding her a place to live. She insists she wants a place where she can garden and plant flowers. I suggested a mobile home community then, as it will give her a little yard to do just that. The bad thing is, if she would just go with the senior housing she would have access to so many amenities. And reduced rent. Hopefully something works out for her. We also had a lady call who has no money for food, needed numbers for food pantries. it is just so sad to see senior citizens in these predicaments. We call them the golden years but for many, there is nothing golden about them.

Carrie got a call today that she has to be at the hospital at 6am for her surgery, rather than 7, so that means I have to be to her house at 5am. Going to be an early morning and long day. I am going to watch Liberty while Ralph and my mom go to the hospital with Carrie. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers as she undergoes this surgery.

On Mother's Day, after the service at church, we all formed a prayer circle, with Carrie, Ralph and Liberty in the middle. We prayed for their health....both for Carrie with all she has going on and for Liberty with her jaundice. The preacher annointed Liberty with oil. Today, the jaundice coloring seems to be gone. Hopefully that means that things are better. We are still waiting for the ultrasound results. I will post when we find out.

Yeah, so I had to cut my post short on Mother's Day, after talking to my brother, because he called to vent about mom. The two of them have had some sort of animosity for a year or so, for who knows why. Neither of them can say a reason, it's just there. He is upset because he feels mom doesn't come over to see Kaden enough. Mom's upset because they never come over here. I think they are both struggling with the change in the family dynamic. Mom not being able to be the "other" woman in his life and he not able to understand the difference btwn daughter/family and son/family. Typically, it seems that the daughter/wife is closer with her family and therefore, more things get done with her family. When wife is unsure of something to do with parenting, she calls her mom. When holidays come around, she organizes time around her family. The leftovers go to the in-laws. Then, mom didn't get any of the kids anything for Easter this year. Money is very tight with dad's layoff. Well, he assumed that she got stuff for my kids and liberty. I assured him she didn't. Well, Carrie and Ralph had done a family basket because she had her baskets in storage in the attic and didn't want to dig them out. Rather than buy 2 new baskets (for liberty and chris), she did one big basket. She brought that basket here on Easter for pictures. Well, Matt saw that basket and assumed that it was from mom and dad. Anyway, it's hard to be placed in the middle of the mess. I can see some points from both sides, and I can see where each side can make changes to bring improvement to the situation. I told him I would talk to mom about it. I was very upset because I know he feels my kids are favored and in some ways, yes, there is a closer relationship but that is because from the time I had my kids, I have always brought them here, I have made the effort. It goes back to the difference in son/family and daughter/family. Then, of course, we are now living here. So, yes, my parents see my kids ALL the time. So, anyway, I talked with mom and hopefully have helped make some sort of a difference.

Makenneh just brought home her Kindergarten Graduation invites. We cut them and got them ready to give out. Of course, the very first person she said she wanted to invite was great grandma. It was so cute. She said, "I really want to invite great-grandma but I know she can't come because she lives up north and it is too far to drive here." We agreed that we could still send her an invite, as I am sure she would love to have one. And speaking of this graduation...it's on a Monday, at 10am. Who does that? What an odd time to have something like this?!

Well, I am off here for now....