Before I go to bed

I meant to post about this last night, but I got caught up on the message board and was too tired to post. I often come here to vent the frustrations of motherhood. But, yesterday was a day with which I was sooo proud, my heart still overflows with pride. And I have to share.

I had to pick Makenneh up early from school for her doctor's appt. She had to have her physical. I had told her before putting her on the bus that I would be there to pick her up. Well, she was not happy to see me, when i got to her class. She started her whining, temper, etc. I knew I was in for a long ride. She sat herself down in one of the chairs and crossed her arms, insisting she didn't want to go. She wanted to stay with her friends. And the waterworks came forth. She was so mad. I remained calm, but was getting more frustrated by the minute. Here we are, in her classroom, complete with teacher, teacher's aid and the parent volunteer and Makenneh is going to engage me in a battle of wills. I could hear Helen's voice in the back of my head, saying not to worry about those around me, to handle the situation as I saw fit (this from her answer on her blog about how she managed to raise such wonderful children). I stayed firm, I grabbed her up and practically dragged her out of the classroom. Now, i didn't fully follow Helen's words, bc what I really wanted to do was spank her. But, I don't think that is appropriate in such a setting..it would lead to embarrassment and I also feel that spanking should be done in a more private spot (even if it means the restroom). I got her coat on her and took her by her arm and led her out of the school. She was crying, throwing a fit, but she was cooperating. I think she knew I meant business. I got her in the car and buckled in and she told me she hated me. (How is all of this good, right? where's the pride?). I told her that it isn't nice to say that to people because it hurts their feelings. I told her she hurt my feelings. I told her she didn't have to like me right now, she shouldn't say she hates me. But, she insisted that it was horrible of me to take her out of her class, away from her friends and "i will miss gym time, mom". I explained to her that if she didn't go to the doctor today that she wouldn't be able to come back to school ever. In as simple as terms as I could, i told her that every kid has to be checked out by the doctor to make sure they are healthy and growing right. We spent the entire trip talking about all of it. I was dreading taking her into the doctor in this mood because there is usually a significant wait at the doctor's office. It was going to be a very long afternoon. We were almost there, and she had calmed down some. I told her that she needed to be very good at the doctor and that if she could be on her best behavior, she would get a reward. I know, bribery. But it worked. This child of mine was the sweetest, most polite, well-behaved child I could have imagined. It was almost as if it were a dream. She went into the waiting room, took her coat off and asked me to hang it on the coat rack, using all her manors. She sat down with me and asked to draw a picture bc she saw the pics other kids had colored that were hanging in the office. I told her we had to wait for the receptionist to return. "Ok, mommy." WHAT? that's what I thought in my head. This is the same child who I expected to melt down, given her earlier behavior. When Amber returned to the desk, she asked Makenneh if she would like to color. Makenneh picked a page out of the coloring book, Amber made a copy and gave her a clipboard and box of crayons. Makenneh sat next to me, while I did homework, and she colored several pages. When she would finish a page, she would close the crayon box and take it all up to the counter. Amber would ask if she wanted to color another one and so it went. When her name was called, we went to the scale to get weighed and measured and to the room. She let the nurse take her vitals, do all the necessary stuff and Makenneh sat quietly. She started to ask about the letters on the paper that covered the bed and we practiced letters. My dear 4 yr old was learning the letters in Cialis (ya know, the drug for erectile dysfunction....lol). Luckily, for her, they were just mere letters. And she didn't ask what they said or anything. She did ask why they were there though. I told her for advertising. We had to wait a bit for the doc to come in and she looked through magazines, drew on some notebook paper I gave her....just waiting patiently. THe doc came in and she was shy and gave him the sort of scowl that are trademark for my kids. Such lovely children that they are. LOL. he got out his tools and of course, had to use the tongue depressor. She opened wide and let him look, no fuss. He was amazed at how well she did. He checked her out and she did was asked of her. Then, came the news, that she needed a few shots. Doc and I kept it on the down-low at the moment. LOL. So, my poor child was oblivious to what her near future held. After the doctor left, I explained to her that she might need a couple shots. She screwed her face up. "but i don't want shots, mommy." I assured her that nobody likes them, but we have to have them to stay healthy. I got the magazine out again and we talked about pictures and what not to keep her mind off it. Then, I asked the nurse, who was right outside our door, where the shots would go. She said the legs, so I asked M to pull her pants down so Tina could see her legs. She was hesitant but cooperated. I told her that Tina was gonna see her legs and as i said that, i touched her knees. She said, mom, i just have bone here. LOL. She realizes, even at 4 that it would hurt to have shots in her knees. I told her that the shots would go right about *here* and touched her upper thighs, where there is plenty of meat. Got a giggle out of her. Then, Tina came in, armed with 3 needles! Makenneh tensed a bit and started to get a bit upset. I asked if she wanted to lay down or sit up and she said she wanted to sit up (i so wouldn't have chosen that...). So, Tina had her sit on her hands and I got right up to her, as close as i could, my arm around her, hugging her. I told her it would be best if she didn't watch. She watched for the most part. Sillly girl. She cried for a brief second after the first and then the second. The 3rd went in her other leg and that was a bit more painful...she let out a cry and Tina said that's the stinger, that's why i do it last. It was over, i held her tight until she was better. She cried very little. Such a brave little girl. We got her dressed again and she got to pick out a sucker (had to have one for buddy, too). She was sooo darn good about the whole thing. When we got home, I gave her her reward, as promised. Just a cheap little trinket toy from walmart (a little castle made of plaster or something that came with a plastic carver and a brush to dig for the buried artifact, hidden deep inside the castle. lol). She loved it and her and buddy played with it and daddy helped a lot. FInally, it was mom who was able to break the horse from deep within the castle. A lot of entertainment for .88.

She was so well behaved all evening, as well. I sang her praises so much. I constantly praised her throughout the whole afternoon and evening. I bragged about her great behavior to everyone....daddy, gma, everyone i talked to. And I was sure she heard it. We left the bad episode at school in the past, it was done and over with and just focused on the excellent behavior thereafter.

Today was an ok day with her. She had a few moments, but it was decent. The chart seems to help, as well. She doesn't want to miss getting a star.

Both kids have been pretty good at bedtime, as well. Sebastian has been in bed by 9pm all week (or longer) and Makenneh usually by 10. A few nights, she has been out at 9 as well. And either way, bedtime has become much more relaxed. We read some books, cuddle up and things run a lot smoother than before. And it's nice to have that extra quiet time. So nice.

Sorry the pictures were so small, that i posted the other day. I saved them from my sister's myspace page and that's the size they saved at. Sometime, when I have free time (hah), i will try to figure out how to resize them or something. For now, my plate is full with school, studying, homework, working with Makenneh, chasing Sebastian out of the next mess, spending time together on the couch or whatever. Little to no spare time. I have to get packing, too. Ugh. The good news is, tomorrow night is my last class for a week or so, bc it's spring break. Hopefully i can catch up on a lot of things, but we will be moving and resettling and so i don't suppose ill have too much time.

WEll, i am tired, so im off to bed, not even gonna run spell check.